Illuminated

from Speaking of Love by Ami Mattison

	/

Streaming + Download

Includes high-quality download in MP3, FLAC and more. Paying supporters also get unlimited streaming via the free Bandcamp app.

Purchasable with gift card

name your price
Buy the Full Digital Album

lyrics

Illuminated

I.

Beneath an absent moon, we wandered
where girls danced to driving beats, made love
in dark corners, and shimmied in sequins or posed

in black leather. I blended, but you
shined blonde, flecked by light and colored
as the eventual dawn that woke us, holding
our bodies in the rose-orange palm of day.

Our arms and legs intertwined in rest and then
restlessly opened, we tongued breasts
and slid down bellies, we mouthed unspoken
promises of second chances, coming
inevitably as the train whistle in the distance.

II.

When you finally confessed to fragile lies
tangled with threaded thoughts of your dying,
my belly ached for your mouth once more
so I might reveal again the swatch of dawn that forgives
mistakes made in despair.

You refused absolution, even as daily you swallowed
bitter wine, drew blood with blades cutting
your wrists, and roped your body to yesterday.

You sacrificed yourself again and then
again upon altars for what you believed
couldn't be forgiven or saved.

III.

That first time, your hair splayed across a pillow.
Above you, I hovered, eclipsing the morning sun
so you might see without squinting. You are light,
I insisted, and I believed if I said it enough you might
remember how shine reflects off of you.

But it would take years turning upon dark days
and long distance calls during darker nights
before I heard you laugh aching tears, and now

you nap in late morning, your hair
tangled in sunshine, and I write
in another room. I ache

for your beauty, your light,
for what never left you.

credits

from Speaking of Love, released February 10, 2017
Written and performed by Ami Mattison

license

some rights reserved

about

Ami Mattison Nashville, Tennessee

“A spoken word force to be reckoned with” (Atlanta Journal-Constitution), Ami Mattison is “a powerhouse poet...sexy, funny, funky, and yet substantive." (TheTennessean).

Touring since 2002, Mattison has performed at various art venues, festivals, conferences, colleges, and universities throughout the US and Canada. ... more